Tolstoy, Cleaning, Ducklings

I was looking for something to read and I picked up this relatively short book by Leo Tolstoy called Confessions. I know of Tolstoy but I don't really know much about him so I started reading and wow. He is doing some serious introspection and questioning on religion and the purpose of life and it sounds so modern even though it was written in the late 1800's.

I spent most of the day inside cleaning, but I did get out for a beautiful walk with a friend this afternoon as well as to rake up some leaves and talk to a neighbor. We are really blessed by our immediate neighbors.

Tonight I go to sleep on clean sheets, with both bathrooms cleaned, the two rooms and stairs with carpet vacuumed, and a new shower curtain hanging in the bathroom. Repeated washings of the old shower curtain did not get out the stains at the bottom and it has been bothering me quite some time. I thought I'd change it when my partner got a new job but I just couldn't take it anymore. Plus we joined a couples group that will meet once a month and the meeting next weekend is here so that became my impetus.

This evening after being active all day I had the patience to sit down at the computer and work on an application for an Education position at the Friends of the Boundary Waters. They asked for a couple writing samples and I was so happy to find this story - well it's non-fiction so not a story - that I wrote a number of years ago about an awful situation with some ducks and a car. So I'm not happy about what happened with the ducks, but I am grateful that I took the time to write about it.

Maybe I should use one of my gratitude entries for a writing sample?  After I had that thought I then thought, "but what would I pick?" I'm not sure I have the patience to look.  We'll see...

Kiva

#1 - I got an email that some of my Kiva money defaulted, which led to a discussion with my partner who wasn't familiar with Kiva! It was a bummer to get the default email, but as I thought about it, I've been lending on Kiva for over ten years. I looked at my stats and I've put in about $200, but that now equals $2,075.00 lent because when it gets paid back I lend it out again. So I guess a couple $25 defaults 12 years later aren't a big deal.

#2 - I have been trying to get my friend that lives near me now to play tennis with me all year. Today, on my last attempt before it gets too cold he agreed. It was a perfect warm fall evening, though we couldn't play long as it gets dark early. I thought my tennis lessons this summer might make me more competitive. Not really.

#3 - I told my friend about the couples group we recently joined and he asked me to send him a list of the discussion topics.

#4 - My partner told me how he'd felt when we were hugging and kissing in the kitchen, he said he'd felt desired and he was grateful for that.

#5 - I haven't spent as much time in nature this year as I would like, however I am grateful for the time outside I do get, which today included the tennis game as well as a bike ride along the Mississippi. There are some trees that have been submerged for a long time and yet are resilient. I wonder how long they can hold out with their roots submerged.

(I forgot to bring a camera on my ride today. These photos are from a few weeks ago.)

The Path Made Clear

#1 - I got a hug from my favorite 10 year old and a "Are you going to be here when we get home from school?" :) from his younger brother this morning.  The youngest also demonstrated how to fold a paper boomerang.

#2 - I don't like the energy of bonding over a common enemy, and "what you resist persists," so sometimes protests doesn't resonate with me.  However, tears came to my eyes when I got downtown tonight and saw all the people who had come together to tell the president, "No."

#3 - I actually really enjoyed my "interview" which felt a lot like a conversation with some in depth questioning with 5 women from the League of Women Voters this afternoon.

#4 - I'm reading

The Path Made Clear

Discovering your Life's Direction and Purpose

by Winfrey, Oprah

Today I read a page with a quote by Eckhart Tolle to my partner and he wanted a copy of it.  It was about how it's more important how you respond to what happens to you, than what happens to you, and that is what will determine your life trajectory.  

#5 - Attending my friend's father's funeral.  I'm super grateful to be able to be there and for having work that has allowed me to be present for so many important events without being stressed out because I will need to catch up.

Wealthy Indeed

#1 - Coming home to a phone message that a good friend of mine's family member died and having the time and space to curl up on the couch and give her my complete attention and presence.  This makes me feel wealthy indeed.

#2 - When I said the time right before death is a "sacred space" and she said, "I knew you'd understand."

#3 - Having a monthly open writing group that is the following afternoon to suggest to her as a way to really sit with and process what she is going thru right now.  I don't know if she'll come, but it felt like something valuable to offer.

#4 - Watching an 11 and 14 year old have to be wrangled in by their father at the park on a cool rainy day after we'd just had dinner under a picnic shelter.

#5 - Climbing into bed after my partner and curling up beside him for a bit before sleep.  (More than 90% of the time I'm in bed first).  When I pulled away he said, "Thanks for connecting."