The Children

 It's been a raw day.  I think it is the first day I can actually say I am looking forward to living alone.  I want to retreat into a turtle shell.  It did help when my friend asked how my morning went and I came to her hug in the kitchen in tears.

And just now, her youngest asked, "When are you leaving?"

"Actually you are leaving first," I said.  (They have a vacation planned.) "Do you mean when am I moving out?"

He nodded. 

"Well, I'll do most of the moving while you are gone and it just depends, when you get back I might just stay a night or so."

"Then I can come and visit you," he said.

"Yes, we already have that planned." 

He smiled.

I finally got to play a little tennis today with his older brother, which is something I've meant to do since I moved in here.

My stoic niece let me hold her in the garage for a while, for once obviously affected by the turmoil around her, and letting herself be comforted.

My nephew volunteered to put sunscreen on himself and join the fun immediately today.  You have to know what a fit he puts on about sunscreen to understand the depth of that gratitude.

 

Kohler-Andre State Park (WI) on Lake Michigan

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Return (Love Comes Back) Rose Cousins

 #1 - I had an old friend, who I haven't seen in over 10 years contact me out of the blue last week.  He is starting a non-profit and wanted to talk to me.  We spoke on the phone Friday and I didn't think I had much to offer but I had one thought, "He needs to talk to Conie."  I suggested the 3 of us talk sometime.  Conie sent an newsletter this weekend so I forwarded it to him saying, "Here is a snippet of the friend I thought to connect you with." His reply,

"WOWIE ZOWIE Tammy - you could not get anymore aligned with what is driving me than what she is already doing!  Thanks!"

#2 - I had an offer accepted on a condo last month and today we scheduled the closing time.

#3 - My cousin that I knew might be going to Italy this summer, emailed me today that she is there and sent a few photos.

#4 - I am picking up a chair from Michael tonight that I really liked and he didn't really use. We were going back and forth on when and where to pick it up and finally he called me and left a message.  The point was we both got a little frustrated trying to schedule this simple thing, but we also both were  trying to accommodate each other. I don't know what our connection will look like in the future, but I have glimmers of hope that it can still be a beautiful one even if not what we imagined.

#5 -Song of the week (I prefer just the song without the video, but can't find a link for that).

Sparklefest and Astrology

After my covid close contact and isolation I'm super glad to have spent nearly 12 hours today with my niece and nephew.  First at the beach and then at "sparklefest" where I got to have a good conversation with my sister-in-law while the kids played. We talked briefly for the first time about the possibility of me visiting them in Japan. At the end I said, "Is Japan even open to foreigners yet?"

The answer was, "Not except tour groups," which made the conversation mute.  But that may change.

My brother thanked me for being more flexible than usual, part of that is just knowing my time with my niece and nephew is limited, so I stayed for the fireworks, even though I'd usually go to bed.  My nephew just covered his ears and said they were too loud. I agree, though these were the "small" fireworks, so they were smaller and shorter, which is my preference.

I also just loved watching the end of my niece's childhood.  What I mean is, she just turned 11 and was running around to the bouncy houses and the hula hoops and when we were leaving, "Can we go run on the bike ramps?!!"  All that childish enthusiasm which often suddenly wains into the teen years.  I don't know if she'll have that when she gets back from Japan, so I soaked it in today.

I started the day writing an email to an old friend who emailed me out of the blue yesterday.  I'd been wondering if something is going on in my astrological chart with all the changes, and then I realized he is someone who knows a lot about these things so I sent him a message asking.  Because I was asking I pulled up my chart and transits myself.  I have a very rudimentary knowledge, but one thing was clear.  Pluto which represents intense transformation or creative destruction, looks like it entered my house of relationships sometime around the time I met Michael, and is nearing the edge of leaving it.  It is also sitting on my mercury, which represents communication.

Transit Pluto in 7th House Your close relationships will undergo great transformation during this period of time. You may reach a crisis or turning point in your marriage or love affair that may cause you to redefine the entire nature of your relationship...Any relationship that is not solid will have difficulty in lasting the entire time of this transit.

https://astromatrix.org/Horoscopes/Transit-in-Houses/Transit-Pluto-in-7th-House 

I told this to Michael today as I am hopefully giving him my dad's lawn mower tomorrow so I called him on the phone. He was curious, said if my friend responds to my email he is curious to hear what he said.  I was just telling my sister-in-law this evening how much I appreciated this.  I'm not even sure how to say it.  But I have a friend who once described me as "out there," not in a judgemental way, just his truth.  I would describe the friend who I emailed the question about astrology as "out there."

So there is this spectrum and I just love where Michael sits on that spectrum, maybe a bit less "out there" than me, but always open about it, always curious. That has been a tremendous gift.