Beauty That Awaits

I was taught this simple practice a number of years ago by Elizabeth Harper - the mandala drawing - supposedly a snapshot of the subconscious (or unconscious I get the two mixed up) from Carl Jung.  You take a piece of paper, you make a big circle, and then you doodle for 20 minutes and at the end you give it a title.  This is the mandala I did the night before I received some devastating news in March.  I had no idea anything was about to happen, but it seems my subconscious did. Looking back on this drawing later, I see a bunch of stick figures firing bullets at each other.  The title I gave it was, "Fallen."

A week ago tonight I'd had a pretty awful day.  I'd been furious.  I'd cried.  And I knew I was going to have a hard time sleeping that night.  So the first thing I did when I climbed into bed was doodle a mandala.  In this case, despite these feelings, a peaceful image came out and the title, "The Beauty that Awaits".

 Hmmm, once again.

 And it was right.

I shared this information with a friend on a walk today.  I almost apologized when I left for dominating the conversation.  Really I should have just thanked her for listening.

I made a big sweet potato and black bean salad to share at a picnic I'm having with friends on Saturday.  It isn't really a potluck and I suspect at least one friend will feel bad if I offer food to share and she doesn't have any, so I'm already prepared to email this quote tomorrow,

"When you attach value to giving help, you attach value to needing help.  The danger of tying your self-worth to being a helper is feeling shame when you have to ask for help.  Offering help is courageous and compassionate, but so is asking for help." Brene Brown

Speaking of asking for help, do you remember when I mentioned a couple weeks ago that after years of being urged to at the dentist, I was finally considering getting an electric toothbrush?  Well one magically appeared from a family member who can kind of be like Santa Claus.   I'm hopeful I will stop taking a beating on my gums. Being told I brush too hard just didn't seem to be working.