La Crosse

When I met the man I'm dating his youngest was 6 and his eldest had just turned 10.  Today I saw the youngest run off to the playground and thought, "Enjoy her childhood it won't be like this much longer."  She is almost 10 herself now, her sister doesn't run to playgrounds anymore.

We were at the eldest's la crosse game.  I was at that same place two weeks ago - trying to connect with their father there and not having much success. 

One week ago, I went again, wanting to be there because we were in a better place, but afterwards I was angry.  Angry from all the feelings I hold inside.

Tonight we were both open.  On the way back to the car he swatted my behind with the lacrosse stick.  "You're being playful," I said, "That much mean you're feeling safe."

Then I went to the co-op to pick up some mid-week groceries and got a hug from the owner where I do yoga in the produce section.  I usually grocery shop on Sundays and it's nice to be restocked and have some meals planned for the weekend, instead of being at the end of my fresh food.

I spent most of my day listening to Byron Katie videos while I worked.  I think in fact every one I listened to were ones I've heard before.  None of them failed to touch me again - especially the one between mother and son.