Saturday, May 14, 2011


#2286 – I put my shelves back on the wall today, but when I put the few framed, mostly family, photos up, it didn’t feel right. Then I had the impulse to try my artwork. This felt great and reminds me (because I still don’t believe it) that I have the ability to draw and paint. This is still how I think of my artistic ability -

#2287 – Feeling crabby inside, but then starting to laugh when I told someone I was crabby. Similarly while riding the bus to volunteer thinking, “Why do I do this? It takes so long to get here?” And then walking in and remembering, “I do this because I enjoy it.”

#2288 – The 13 or 14 year old boy who proved me wrong at the food shelf/market where I’ve been volunteering once a month. Last month he was there with his mother and she said he would like to start volunteering. They asked which Thursday each month he’d like to do. (I couldn’t really hear the conversation, but I would hear the volunteer coordinator’s excited reply.) “EVERY thursday!” he said. Then they talked about Saturdays (the market is open every Thursday and Saturday.) “Oh, you want to do Sat. too. Which Saturdays?....EVERY Saturday!”

When I heard this kid was going to start coming every Thursday and Saturday I thought, “That’s not going to happen.”

Well, I came back one month later and…it’s happening.

#2289 – Working at the market next to a 9 year old whom I enjoyed talking to the whole time. As usual I am more social/happy around a child.

#2290 – Blogger being unavailable Thursday eve so I could wait for permission to use this email from a friend in my gratitudes.

"’it is either true or untrue that I will be in a relationship. It is either true or untrue that a woman and I are now approaching one another.’ In other words, why worry? Why fantasize? It is either true or untrue that God is working with, or against, my wishes to have a girlfriend. It seems to me now that God is the most important thing.”

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